When His Lips Move

I did not watch Obama on Leno last night. I don't watch any event where he's speaking, not even the State of the Union. I catch the highlights later on some news show or another. Why? Because everything the man says is either (a) a lie or (b) uses words in a way never intended.

Let's take that big speech at the National Defense University, where he said wars end and the war on terror is now over. This week, he closes 19 embassies because those on-the-run Al Qaeda guys we no longer have to worry about are going to launch attacks.

On Leno, he said he we don't need "a huge government." Wow! Yes! Right on, Mr. President! But, see, his definition of a smaller government is one without a Congress, a Supreme Court, a Bill of Rights or anything that could possibly oppose His Majesty. He would keep the military, but he'd rename it the Stazi.  

Ignore his words. Pay attention to what he does, like the unilateral-and-illegal suspension of the employer mandate. He has threatened to veto a Congressional measure codifying the very same thing. You know what that means: he's going to enforce the mandate, despite what he said. When businesses go, "Hey! What's this? The IRS is making me pay!", he'll say they're mistaken, and then audit them.

Everything, every word the guy utters, is a lie. Except once, when he said he will fundamentally change the US.

That was dead-on accurate.

The Only, Important Question

I do not care about Petraeus' talking points, or about Susan Rice's day long lie-fest. I don't care about Susan Rice at all. Her career's over, anyway, because she has proven herself more loyal to Barack Obama than to the country.

There is only one question I've got: Where was Barack Obama while the Embassy was under attack, and was he the person who refused to send help?

I guess that's two questions.

Empathy

Laura Ingraham just said something that struck a chord with the Schlub. Baracula was abandoned by his mom and dad and decided to go hard core left. Hmmm. Not to seek any sympathies out there, but Schlub suffered through Mommy and Daddy's rather violent, traumatic divorce, leaving me pretty much on my own from age 15 on. Oddly, I went into this hard core anarchist, destroy everything, crash the system, the world just sucks stage, too. Wanted revenge, I guess, just like Baracula does. Difference is, Bambi, I grew out of it. Why don't you?

Retro

Mark Steyn had a brilliant observation yesterday: Obama's call for a nuclear-free world is a Cold War issue, you know, non-proliferation. How 80's. Which gives you a major clue about the man- he is nothing but a walking, talking bumper sticker of every failed hippie boner since 1967. That's why he's so dated, why everything he's pushing sounds so ridiculous, it's all been said before, all been shouted from streets and Reflecting Pools ad infinitum, ad nauseum until it's just trope. But, that's the problem with bleeding hearts, they haven't had an original idea since Rousseau. And his were stupid.

Bong addled theories, 2

Nope. Apparently not. Public option back on the table. That's the problem with stupid ideas, you can't ever abandon them. Otherwise, you look stupid.

Bong addled theories

When your entire philosophy was formed during late night law school parties, you shouldn't be terribly surprised when it gets shredded by the buzz saw of reality. So, Baracula, bubbi, public option, think maybe it's time to give that the ole heave-ho? And maybe a few of your other really bright ideas? Cap and trade? Stimulus? You gettin' it?

Wrong guy

Enemies' list. Hypersensitivity. Paranoia. Idiot vice-president.

He's not the second coming of Jimmy C.

He's Nixon.

Let nothing happen

I hope absolutely nothing happens to Barack Obama. Not impeachment, resignation, God forbid some kind of disability. Nope. I want him to serve every second of his four years. Not just to keep Joe Biden out of the Presidency, which would mean we'd all have to wear bags over our heads, but something more important.

Barack Obama is the death knell of liberalism.

See, if the Prom King gets to enact every one of those adolescent ideas in his pointy little head, and this Marxist playskool Congress agrees, then everyone, finally, will see how bankrupt those ideas are. The absolute stupidity of liberal thought (I know, oxymoronic) will be proven. Once we limp towards 2012, a broken shell of ourselves, in chaos, disntegrating, you can pretty much be sure no Dumbocrat will ever serve in any office higher than page boy ever again.

And yeah, I know, that's what we said about Carter. But, hey, this clown makes Carter look like Reagan.

So, live long and prosper, Barack. You'll be a fine cautionary tale.

Depends on your world view

If your only tool is a hammer, then every problem is a nail. Maslow. Good guy, despite that silly pyramid. It's a world view he's talking about, not just approaches.

Let's say you've grown up with a ragingly hippie-ish mom who, in between her forays to God knows where, talked all this revolutionary crap, and then your Third World Oppressed dad sent you to all these schools steeped in a rigid, thought murdering ideology filled, also, with revolutionary fervor. Then you find the corner and a bunch of friends with thuggishness as their main trait and you've got bong resin layering your brain…

Pretty soon, all you've got is that hammer. And the world is nails.

So, through your efforts intimidating landlords and banks to give away money you claim has, somehow, been stolen from the Honest Working Poor, when, really, your thug friends just want to buy Cadillacs, you come to the notice of some lusting, grasping rich guy, say like George Soros. So the grooming begins. You, somehow, get in to Harvard (nope, no affirmative action here) and you quickly discover, in the world of Left and Symbolism, that it isn't so much what you do but what you are, so you start running for prestigious positions by spouting the proper sequence of words guilty privileged white people have attached a lot of symbolism to and you start winning. You keep your position by spouting these symbolic words in nice ways, even though you haven't really done a blasted thing.

So other rich, hateful white people notice you and take you on and you start administering million dollar funds and this is easier than shaking down banks because well, a couple of symbolic words on paper, and you can give that money to your other thuggish friends, no one the wiser. Cool.

Then you figure, hey, why not run the place, so you say the symbolic words to a ward filled with your thuggish friends and they remember all the good times and you're a Senator. Don't have to do much. Spread a little money here and there, say symbolic things, vote 'Present." Make good speeches.

Next thing you know, you're President.

Cool.

So, you and the boys recall those Masters Seminars and really cool classes and it's time to crush this capitalist oppressive, racist, society and turn it into the Utopia the remnants of your bong resin harks back to from time to time. So, bankrupt the system, crash the market, have a laugh with the wife, maybe start a war with the racist Zionist state over there oppressing the good honest peoples of Palestine, break all those bitter clinging-to-their-guns working people who are nothing but racists and stupid, anyway.

The world is just one big nail.

The real speech last night before a joint session of Congress

Peasants and vassals,

By now, you've realized how badly you screwed up by electing me. Some of you thought I was a Communist and, surprise! I am. I mean, look at how much of your money I just stole with the stimulus package! And this Recovery Act, oh man. You suckers will be paying the bills of illegal aliens and scofflaws for at least the next three generations. Too much, too much.

Now that is a pretty good start, but there's still lots to do before I have all of you in my power. I'm now going to make a move on healthcare, energy, and education. Healthcare first. It's real simple- once you reach 65 years old, we're going to kill you. Snuff you out. Soylent green is people! I love that movie.

Energy. Well, this is going to tie in to health care because there isn't going to be any energy so you'll have to walk everywhere and go to bed at dark. It's healthier.

And last, education. Tell you the truth, there isn't a whole helluva lot more I can do with it. It's working great. I mean, you elected me. But I do promise the Barack Obama Memorial schools will get new textbooks. We will teach your children what a racist country America is, despite last November (can I get a shout out to my homey Eric?), and that Jews and white people with Roman noses are responsible for all of the bad things that ever happened to any of the good, honest, natural people of color throughout the world. White people kill puppies, you know. Your children will learn new hymns of praise to the reborn Socialist Man and will sing it every day before going out to cut the sugar cane. That's also healthy.

So, thanks again for your vote, your money, your stupidity. I'll be coming by later to take your house and give it to some friends of mine.

The bombing begins in five minutes

A friend of mine (yes, Schlub has friends) is a real Obamamaniac, is on the mailing list. He forwarded the finished version of this EMail to me, why, I dunno, but I did some research and found this draft version, which someone inadvertently left on a White House server:


From: President Barack Obama [mailto:info@barackobama.com] Sent: Monday, February 02, 2009 1:34 PM To: (cut)

Subject: What recovery means for you

Pat** --The economic crisis is growing more serious every day, and the time for action has come [JUST SEND US ALL YOUR MONEY] .

Last week, the House of Representatives passed the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act [CUTE TITLE, RIGHT? PEOPLE ACTUALLY THINK THAT'S WHAT IT IS!] , which will jumpstart our economy and put more than 3 million people back to work [FOR THE GOVERNMENT, MY LEGIONS, MY LEGIONS]. I hope to sign the recovery plan into law in the next few weeks [BEFORE SOME OF YOU IDIO...I MEAN, CITIZENS, ACTUALLY READ IT] . But I need your help to spread the word and build support.

It's not enough for this bill to simply pass Congress [THEY HAVE TO LOVE IT, TOO]. Americans need to know how it will affect their lives -- they need to know that help is on the way and that this administration is investing in economic growth and stability [JUST FOCUS ON THE LAST PART, KEEP REPEATING IT OVER AND OVER. YOU'LL COME TO BELIEVE IT.]

Governor Tim Kaine has agreed to record a video [THAT'S ONE BILLION GONE RIGHT THERE] outlining the recovery plan and answering questions about what it means for your community [THE QUESTIONS HAVE ALREADY BEEN CAREFULLY THOUGHT OUT AND PLANTED]. You can submit your questions online [HA! FAT CHANCE!] and then invite your friends, family, and neighbors to watch the video [SO WE CAN REGISTER YOU FOR THE NEW CIVILIAN CORPS. GOT THESE NIFTY BROWN UNIFORMS] with you at an Economic Recovery House Meeting [CUTE TITLE, HUH?].

Join thousands of people across the country by hosting or attending an Economic Recovery House Meeting this weekend. [OR ELSE] .

The stakes are too high to allow partisan politics to get in the way [IF I'M GOING TO TAKE OVER THIS COUNTRY, I CAN'T HAVE ANYBODY QUESTIONING MY METHODS] .That's why I've consulted with Republicans [HAHAHAHAHAAAAA! SORRY, COULDN'T RESIST] as well as Democrats to put together a plan that will address the crisis we face [JUST GIVE US ALL YOUR MONEY]. I've also taken steps to ensure an unprecedented level of transparency and accountability [MAN, I'VE TOLD YOU ABOUT OUR TAX CHEATING. HOW MUCH MORE TRANSPARENCY DO YOU NEED?]. Once it's passed, you will be able to see how every penny in this plan is being spent [YEP, AS WE TAKE YOUR HOUSE AWAY, YOU'LL SEE WHO WE'RE GIVING IT TO].

You can help restore confidence in our economy by making sure your friends, family, and neighbors understand how the recovery plan will impact your community [AND IF THEY DON'T, KILL THEM]. Sign up to host or attend an Economic Recovery House Meeting and submit your question for the video now:http://my.barackobama.com/recovery.

Our ability to come together as a nation in difficult times has never been more important [IF PEOPLE WISE UP, I CAN'T TAKE]. I know I can rely on your spirit and resolve as we lead our country to recovery [OR I'LL KILL YOU] .

Thank you,President Barack Obama

P.S. -- If you can't host or attend an Economic Recovery House Meeting, you can still submit your questions for Governor Kaine and then share the video with your friends and family this weekend. Learn more here:http://my.barackobama.com/recovery [INVITE A SALLIE MAE GUY. THEY GAVE ME A LOT OF MONEY]

[MAN, I CAN'T BELIEVE THESE IDIOTS ARE ACTUALLY BUYING THIS. WELL, SHOULDN'T BE SURPRISED, THEY DID VOTE FOR ME....WHOOPS! IS THIS THING STILL ON?]

In search of an honest Democrat

Geez. Lou. Eeze.

I guess if you hang out with terrorists, real estate frauds, and raving racists, you don't have much experience with law abidin' folk.

That's why the Marxist hired a Republican- at least one guy in his cabinet will pay taxes.

Sort of up to snuff

So, Barry, wasn't you that flubbed the lines, Justice Stevens did.

You get credit for that.

But, Barry, the speech. When you say things like our ideals won't be compromised and we'll fight for them, whatever the actual wording, I'm not buying it. See, you don't have much of a track record when it comes to things martial. You're a bit of a creampuff.

But, your intent to impoverish future generations with your unworkable stimulus package, your desire to enroll everyone in some kind of national Brownshirt organization to, I guess, go out and cut the sugar cane, and your targeting the goods of hard working people for distribution to non- hard working people, that I can believe.

You have a much better track record on that.

Not up to snuff

Flubbed your lines? Barry, didn't you study?

That speech, Barry. A dud. Did you write it yourself?

That benediction, Barry. Racist, man. Racist. Reverend Wright racist. Which, to you, isn't racism.

And your supporters. How low class, how coarse. What a bunch of sniveling children.

You're the President? You?

Oh Lord.

Symbol with some Substance

The Marxist is going to use Lincoln's Bible for the swearing-in. I think that's quite appropriate.

Lincoln fought the second half of the War for Independence, vanquishing the royalist South and enforcing the most basic American precept- that all men (read 'mankind,' for those of you anachronistically challenged) are created equal.

It's only fitting that a grandson of those freed by Lincoln should take an oath on that Bible.

'Course that's where they part company. Lincoln fought to preserve the Union; the Marxist is bent on destroying it.

Who's on First?

The Marxist called Governor Paterson, er, Blago, and said he supported Caroline, er, Jarret, for the vacant Senate seat.

I'm not getting any indication of a pattern here. Nope, not at all.

And he looked so sincere

At the press conference today, the Marxist was shocked, shocked! to find corruption in Chicago politics. Shake of the rueful head. Yes, it is sad, my peasant minions, that SOME people (meaningful glance in Blago's direction) get into politics and treat it like a business. While others (humble drop of the eyes) enter for the High and Nobel Purpose of Serving the Peeeeepuuuul.

Uh huh.

Which, of course, must mean going to a city renowned for its corruption and…

(a) lining up with a rabid racist church (b) joining a hard left board distributing millions to radicalized education programs (c) running around and forcing banks to give loans to absolutely unqualified people in the name of community organizing (which, of course, has just NOTHING to do with our current financial difficulties, right?) (d) using thug tactics to throw everyone else off the ballot and ensuring your election to the State Senate (e) your wife getting a 175% raise after (before? eh, can't remember) you engineer a state grant to her workplace (f) get a real sweetheart land and house deal through your good pal Rezko (friend o' Blago) (g) vote for infanticide (h) vote 'present' on everything else (i) get into the Senate and do absolutely nothing but run for President and (j) accept foreign and fraudulent contributions to your campaign…

is not at all self serving but Service to the Peeeeeeeeeeepul?

Spare me.

Say it ain't so, O

"Birds of a feather flock together."

"Those who sleep with dogs will rise with fleas."

"You're known by the company you keep."

Rezko, Blago, Ayers, Dohrn, Klonsky, Wright, Rathke.

The prosecution rests.